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i booked the next two days off work. kind of worried about getting bored especially since i’m going to my home town but even if i get bored i think it’ll be good for me. need a little while away from work to get in a better mind set, so a 5 day weekend seems like it could do the trick

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me irl: wishing there were someone here to talk a lot to about nothing
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I’ve been working out lately with my friend.  My apartment building has this tiny little workout room and we’ve been going twice a week.  I’ve always hated working out but lately it’s actually been fun?  I’m proud of myself for going consistently for the last couple of weeks and actually liking it.  

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Pre-potluck selfies
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I get embarrassed way too easily

Every time I drink I wake up the next morning and feel embarrassed over the dumbest, tiniest things.  I need to learn how to not sweat the small stuff

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i went to forward my school e-mail to my personal e-mail account, and something glitched and all of my old e-mails popped up in my personal account.  there were just some messages that i could have gone without seeing.  and now i’m drinking coffee and listening to sad music and feeling lonely

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sometimes it amazes me how far i’ve come in a matter of months.  at the beginning of this year i was at an all time low and i really couldn’t fathom how i could continue on at the rate i was going.  after seeking out help and allowing myself to be “selfish” and do what was best for me at the time i’ve finally gotten through all of that.  

no promises that i won’t experience it again, but i know i can overcome those feelings even when it felt like i never could.  i’m so happy that i’m happy.

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Ok, so I’m going through my old facebook photos and deleting a bunch

And I guess I’ve kind of come to the realization that while I don’t think poorly of myself, I’ve never particularly felt good about myself either.

Looking back on these pictures there are definitely some key moments where I felt fat and ugly and that I stuck out like a sore thumb.  But looking at them now I look happy and cute, and I guess I wish I could have just felt that way at the time.

This is still something that I struggle with, even though I don’t feel like I have poor self esteem

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THEME